Thursday, November 08, 2012

"That's true. I used to teach Ancient History." "That's me, Ancient History!"

  Wherein Jack Attempts a Social Life.

 In the middle of editing I heard of a ladies party. I like to think of myself as a lady. A slightly reckless - okay, not slightly - loves sword fighting, Tomboyish, adventurous, lady. I like tea and pretty dresses, but it is time to face the facts. I don't know what to do at parties.

 Putting on a pretty, white - bad idea - dress, I went to the party because people like to tell me, "You need to get out more," and they had tea and snacks. I realized two things.

 One. Me and white, do not mix. No matter how careful I am, it usually ends in disaster.

 Two. All one does at parties is talk. There is no hiding behind the curtain with Laurie, no glaring at Mr. Darcy, no getting in a debate with Thornton, and - sadly - no shooting off fireworks in a tent. Children parties are so much more exciting. 

 However, I did attempt to be social, so I should get points for that. And that really had no purpose to anything in the writing world, but I wrote it anyways.

 Right now though, I think another snippet is due. ( I KNOW! TWO snippets! I'm turning into a softy.Actually, it is just a ploy. A delusion. As soon as Hermits United ends the snippets are likely to vanish.)

 I've been having fun with my story, now that I've finished editing and can write again. (I'm still doing little of the story telling. I just write and everyone does what they like. Today, a band of thieves came unusual band I've kind of grown attached to. A band who has animal nicknames. You can meet some of them below.)

You could loosen these ropes,” Hugh was saying, “the blood flow to my arms has nearly stopped.”
If I do you will punch me again,” Skunk whined. Trisli noticed for the first time he had a black eye under all the grime on his face.
No,” Hugh shook his head, “trust me, that is something I am never going to do again.”
Bear laughed and the ground seemed to shake from it. “I like you, Fox!”
He scares me,” Weasel whispered.
Everything scares you,” Raccoon clattered. His teeth started to chatter.
How much coffee have you had?” Snake asked him, his eyebrows going up.
Five cups – No! Twelve!”
Bear pried the cup he now held out of his hands. “I think twelve is enough.”
Raccoon sat back and stared at the burly man with eyes which looked ready to pop from his head. “It is?” he clattered.
More than enough,” Bear grumbled and emptied the cup into the fire. The flames hissed and smoke shot into the air. Raccoon stared at it as if he had never seen anymore more interesting in his life.
The other thieves went back to talking, or arguing, or insulting each other – whichever took their fancy – but Raccoon didn't take his eyes from the fire. Trisli couldn't have asked for a better opportunity.
Moving behind Raccoon and crouching low in the bushes, Trisli deepened his voice as much as possible, and began to whisper.
Do you like coffee?” It seemed like a stupid thing to ask, but he didn't know how else to start a conversation with a man named Raccoon.
Yes,” Raccoon murmured dreamily. None of the other men so much as looked at him, if they even heard him.
But, they took your coffee away,” Trisli said in his low voice.
I know, they do that a lot,” Raccoon chattered.
Doesn't it make you mad?”
Oh. “Does it make you sad?” Trisli asked, trying again.
Yes. I cry a lot.”
Please don't cry, he begged silently. He didn't need to see a man named after an animal, who smelled like one too, bawling his eyes out.
Why do you let them take it?”
They have meaner names then me.”
Owls aren't mean,” Trisli growled, his throat starting to ache, “why don't you slug him? Look, he's even asleep.”
Owl sleeps in the day.”
I know,” he muttered, “but, why don't you wake him up and teach him not to take your coffee.”
This time, Raccoon said nothing and Trisli feared the man had fallen into some kind of coffee induced stupor. He considered poking him, but Raccoon didn't need it. Without warning he leaped up and hurled himself on top of the snoring Owl.
You'll pay for that you coffee hog!” he yelled. “I shall be avenged!”

 Allons-y and what is your word count?



  1. Okay, I know this mightn't have been your original intention when writing that little snippet, but I just got a picture of a raccoon pouncing on an owl in my head and it's rather disturbing.
    What have you done!? =P

    My word count is 7,774! (Seriously, I should try to squeeze in exactly three words somewhere...)

    This is still a little behind, but that's all in the plan. I'm creeping slow and steady-like.


  2. I wholeheartedly agree--children's parties are much more fun than adult parties. I can't stand small talk, and so parties aren't quite my thing. :P I have started bringing card games to parties, though--it's fun, and some good conversations can get get started during games.(:

    Thank you for sharing the snippet! I love Raccoon.(:


  3. "I shall be avenged!" Loved that line!! Of course, I ended up thinking of Loki and Thor for some weird reason (honestly, it came out of the blue).

    Ack, parties are scary. They're worse if someone throws them for yourself. In honour of...horror...a birthday or the like. I'm very bad at small talk too. And white is trouble.

  4. Jack ~ I give you full marks for bravery; going out, attending parties, engaging in small talk. I detest being told that I need to get out more. I *do* get out more. I am just usually undercover at the time.

    I know that you've had people tell you this before, but you really have a flare for dialogue. It flows along delighfully, and feels completely natural. I really respect good dialogue.

    I hope you were able to watch Sherlock die tonight. Had you really not seen that episode yet? It is quite superiour. Between that and the Hounds of Baskervill, I almost forgave them for that Irene Adler debacle. Almost.

  5. Lovely snippet!

    You sound a bit like Maryanne with the party thing. Of course, she's used to parties, and ... oh, Maryanne ...

    And my word count, if I remember right, is around 10,000 words. I've pulled myself off of it until I have Take formatted, because a formatted Take is more important than a written book 3. Take has a deadline.

  6. Ugh, I hate parties. Socialize?! ME? Nooooooooooooooooooo! (in my best Darth Vader impersonation) I only go when under duress and then I proceed to ward off panic attacks the whole time. So you get many, many points from me for being so brave. :D

    Hee! Your snippet made me snicker.

    Um.... my word count is 16600-ish. I hit a plot snag unexpectedly and after banging my head several times upon my unfortunate keyboard, turned off my laptop until I could figure out how to clear said snag. I have yet to do this and am going to dedicate my weekend to sorting it out. *goes to fetch lots of coffee and chocolate* :)

  7. I like the banter.
    Glad men don't have parties like that.

  8. loved the snippet :)
    God Bless

  9. PS
    Social life is dumb. Hollywood has decieved us. NASTY hollywood. Who wants to socialize anyway? *I* would hide behind a curtain with you... We wouldn't want Mr. Darcy to find us would we? No. We must stay out of sight. and I would cover for you... "Oh no. Jack isn't here... no no..."

    1. We shall sneak cookies behind our curtain and spy on everyone.

  10. There should be more shooting fireworks in tents at parties, and the world would be a merrier (and sootier) place. You host a party like that, I'll teleport myself and come. :)

  11. I have not commented for a looong time. I am so sorry about that! I still read every one of your posts, though. =) Love the excerpts! And good work getting out. Getting out is important. God created us to be in relationship with one another. =)

    Did you see the latest E-Lock episode? The end has me interested to see the next episode. Sigh... they have E-Lock's dad and E-Lock's "friend" but what about Mycroft???

    I found Alph-Art at my library... I've also seen it at bookstores around. The unfinished version by Herge.
    They really do need to give us some information of the next Tintin movie! It's been long enough... Sadly I think it's probably more a side project for Jackson and Spielberg. Something for the geeks. Sigh.

    I can't wait for the short story collection! I've got money. Mwahahahaaaa....

    Oh. My. Word!!! I SAW BLINK!!! Wow. That was one of the coolest episodes ever. So quoteable! And the plot (especially the time line) is totally wibbly wobbly. And the two preceding episodes... With the Doctor turned human. Excellent character development. I loved Human Doctor just 'cause he was so sweet. And he fell down the stairs. That was funny. I felt sorry for Martha though... "That wasn't on the list." David Tennant is truly a versitile actor. Human Doc and the real Doctor were totally different characters, yet so the same... I am DYING to get the next disk from Netflix (I think it comes on Monday. Grr.) because it has Captain Jack Harkness in it! I like Jack. I think it also has the Master in it... Which will be quite exciting as I have been waiting to meet him. Hurry up and come disk!

    Also (we've talked about this before), you are going to see the Hobbit on opening night, right? I just found out the other night that I have a choir concert on the opening night so I won't be able to go until the 15th!

  12. Yet another brilliant snippet!!
    And I fully agree about parties.....unless there are games involved, I love me some Mad Gab or Apples to Apples! =)
    Go ahead and save me a spot in the blog party! Maybe not one of the first spots though..... ;-)


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