Monday, December 15, 2014

"I freed his wretched head from his miserable body."

 Things Nick Fury dislikes.

 SHIELD agents who don't know where the south is without a navigation system.

 Aliens who attack his planet and have bigger guns than he does.

 Tony Stark

 Aliens who destroy his big guns when they come to the planet

 Aliens who kill his best agent

 His missing eye

 Aliens who are sassier than he is.

 Ants.

 Aliens who destroy New York and don't help clean up.

 Tony Stark

 People in higher command who make stupid decisions.

 His missing eye

 Hawkeye getting brainwashed.

 Aliens who brainwash Hawkeye.

 Certain agents betraying and trying to kill certain cute British agents.

 Glow sticks of destiny.

 Tony Stark

 Tony Stark's nicknames for everyone.

 Aliens who use his Hulk prison to try and kill their brother.

 His missing eye.

 Winter Soldiers who blow up his car.

 A car that is sassier than him.

 Steve Rogers not thinking of him as his friend

 Not having a wife.

 Tony Stark

 Tony Stark having two eyes.

 Getting shot.

 Sometimes large green men with tempers.

 His missing eye.

 His helicarrier getting attacked

 Tony Stark

 Tony Stark being the only one who can save his helicarrier

 Tony Stark being sassier than he is

 HYDRA taking over SHIELD

 The stupid HYDRA salute.

 A 95-year-old WWII Captain war hero and legend telling him he has to shut down SHIELD.

  A 95-year-old WWII Captain war hero who still doesn't think of him as a friend.

  A 95-year-old WWII Captain war hero who thinks it is his fault all the Tony Starks in the world are going to be killed.

 Tony Stark

 His missing eye.

 Things Nick Fury likes.

 Phil Coulson.


ALLONS-Y!

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9 comments :

  1. I'd have to say Stark is high on his list.

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  2. BEST. POST. EVER. LIKE FABULOUS

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  3. I needed that. It was perfect.

    And...HI! Long time no comment-on-your-blog-from-me! :)

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  4. Does that mean he hates his eye patch too?
    (I don't blame him... I had to wear one to take a vision test today and it was super annoying... and I had to fight the urge to say "Arrr, matey!" like a pirate.)

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  5. I think you forgot one thing:

    Tony Stark.

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  6. Oh, this is hilarious! I'm sitting in the library trying really hard not to bust out laughing. I love this.

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  7. THIS.
    THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER.

    "Tony Stark having two eyes."
    I. Died.

    AND THEN THAT LAST PART. THE THINGS HE LIKES.

    Oh, Jack, you truly are the best.

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  8. Okay, my day just went up a million points. That was the BEST!! I haven't laughed like that for awhile. Well, I might have laughed like that a few days ago, but not over a post. Well, maybe over a post, but not over YOUR post!! (Poor Tony. All that hatin'. :-)

    Did you get your pressie yet? Didja? Didja? Didja?

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